Blog #Testimony

Patsy Hahn

  Trust in the LORD with all your heart,

  And lean not on your own understanding;

  In all your ways acknowledge Him,

  And He shall direct your paths.

 Proverbs 3:5-6

Patsy's testimony is presently being transcribed and will be available on the blog soon. :)

Patsy shared her testimony on a Truth, Talk & Testimonies

For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope. 

Jeremiah 29:11

The heart of her husband safely trusts her;So he will have no lack of gain.She does him good and not evilAll the days of her life.

Proverbs 31:11-12

Berean Bible Church 

Hope Builders Ministry (giving people hope after losing a spouse)

2675 High Street

Pottstown, PA 19464

Church Website: https://bereanbiblefamily.org/

Church Phone Number: 610-326-8794

Cindy Rosenthal

Health Services Administrator and Author

"For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope." Jeremiah 29:11

"So I will restore to you the years that the swarming locust has eaten," Joel 2:25

Cindy shared her story on a VictoryEmbraced: Truth, Talk & Testimonies broadcast.

May you share about your childhood and the process you went through to go from being a survivor to thriving? 

I grew up in a difficult household environment. My parents were highly abusive, and my father was a man of violence. At a very young age, I witnessed his violence toward my mother. I remember when I was 5 years old; we lived in an apartment and I watched him nearly take my mother’s life by strangling her in front of the window. Thankfully, he let her go. 

This is the history of my parents’ relationship until they separated for the last time when I was about 8 years old. My father was physically and verbally abusive to me throughout most of my life. I was 8 when they got divorced, but unfortunately, my mother learned from my father and abused me the same way. Growing up in that atmosphere was difficult, but after a while, I learned not to feel anything and that’s what I did, so when my father hit me, I was told that I didn’t have any reason to cry about it and I brought it upon myself. When my mother hit me, I tried to think of something else so that I wouldn’t feel what she did. My legs were covered in welts and I suffered from bloody noses which caused me great pain. As time passed, I came to accept it, and my grandparents became the only thing that brought me happiness in my upbringing.

I don’t remember a lot about my teenage years; I don’t have any memory of it because I believe it was God’s protection. He shut my memories off and took them away from me, so over the years of 13–17, I don’t have many memories of those years growing up. I only have fragments of memory and not much else. It was a response to trauma to preserve oneself. 

My grandparents brought me so much joy during those years until I turned 15. My grandmother used to pick me up after school every Friday and we would spend the entire weekend together at their house until she got sick. It was a special time together and I will always be thankful to her. We were very close, and to this day, there are things my grandmother told me that I never repeated to anybody because we had that kind of relationship. She was my saving grace. 

What is the importance of allowing the Lord to heal us and make us whole? Can you share your process of becoming that thriver?

It was a long process for me, but it all started at 16 when I decided to turn off my emotions. I think that was the only way I could make it through everything happening in my life. I was at a loss after my grandmother’s passing and shut down as a result. The continuous abuse from my mother and the overwhelming unhappiness led me to shut down for approximately 8 years until the Lord intervened in my life at 24.

When the Lord came into my life, I felt God say to me that it was time to tune my emotions back on and to start to feel again. A lot of people feel such joy, and for me, there was a lot of pain that I needed to come to terms with, so I started a journey of healing, and my dear friend Goldie helped me tremendously.

About 6 months after I accepted the Lord, I started to work with Goldie. The interesting thing is that through all the pain I faced growing up, this was the first time that somebody said to me, “Cindy, you are allowed to feel,” so for me, this was the beginning of the journey of feeling and coming to terms with what happened and starting to accept what happened during my childhood. This was the beginning of my healing process, and it continued for years. I will never forget it. Goldie brought in a Rabbi one night to pray for me, and this Rabbi prayed and spoke with me for over 4 hours and helped me with prayers of deliverance to where I could move on with my life and I could say, Okay, it’s safe for me to feel anything I want to feel and shed tears because it’s okay—there’s nothing wrong with shedding tears—there’s nothing wrong with allowing yourself to feel so for me, at that point; this is when I started my healing journey. So when you go through this, there are so many levels, and for many years I went through allowing myself to heal—allowing myself to feel pain—allowing myself to say, Okay God, you’re coming into my life now. I now have you and you’re going to heal me. You’re going to give me things that I’ve never had in my life before. Through this process, God did so much work in my life. I can’t say that it’s all been easy because it hasn’t. I spent 14 years at the congregation where that journey started and then God took me out of that congregation and brought two people and other people in my life who weren’t at that congregation. I met a Rabbi and his wife in the beginning of my healing up in Albany, New York, who became parents to me, who became a mother and a father to me that I never had and this was what God did for me because the scripture says that God’s going to restore what the locust has eaten—God did that. So God gave me parents at an age that I needed them, so they also helped me and I started going up to Albany every 6–8 weeks and God used them. That’s when I started using the scripture Jeremiah 29:11 in my life. “For I know the thought that I think toward you, says the Lord, thought of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope,” and through that process, God gave me a future and a hope because I ended up in Albany, NY, 14 years later for another journey. Healing is a process—it’s not something that’s going to happen overnight; it didn’t happen overnight—it didn’t happen overnight for me, but if you stay with the process, God heals us. He heals us physically and emotionally because that’s what He promises us, so I held onto that promise that God would heal me and then God started the next part of my journey when I moved to Albany and He used my spiritual parents to help me through the next part of that journey and that’s where I spent the next almost 18 years. It’s still a process because I still go through it—I’m still on that journey because that journey continues as I moved to Florida 3 ½ years ago and the next part of my healing journey started—God never leaves us or forsakes us, but it’s a process and that’s the important thing. 

While in Florida, God did a huge deliverance. I went to a meeting one night when I was in despair and received prayer—it was such a powerful night that I walked in despair and when I left, Goldie looked at me and said, “You are a different person—your countenance has changed; you look different and from that night I realized God did a work in me. That night, God started the next part of the journey of healing, so it’s a process because with a lot of healing, you need to go through and as you go through the process, you see how the Lord does the work. It’s important that you allow God to do the work and see how He moves in your life—you see how God is working and what He has for you because through this process, there have been terrible times in my life, but I also see what the Lord has done in my life, and that’s what I hold on to more than the terrible times as a child and adult as a woman of God where you have to trust God even through the hardest times—you hold on to what God says and God has a plan for your life.

Cindy's story is written in the book Hope Alive: Debilitated to Exhilarated with God by Connie A. VanHorn--Ambassador Coordinator of Women World Leaders and Kimberly Ann Hobbs--President/Founder of Women World Leaders (World Publishing & Productions). 

Jayson Borawski

"So I will restore to you the years that the swarming locust has eaten," Joel 2:25

Jayson shared his testimony on a VictoryEmbraced: Truth, Talk & Testimonies broadcast. 

These are the questions that I asked Jayson during his interview on the VictoryEmbraced: Truth, Talk & Testimonies YouTube channel, and what he shared. 

Jason, please share about your childhood and how your upbringing affected your life.

I’ll start by sharing that my father served in World War II, and he faced a lot of problems—he consumed alcohol before going to war, but he developed into a serious alcoholic.

My mom and I rode out to California, and when we came home to an empty house, it was extremely tough. We moved further out in Montgomery County, and while we were out there, my mother married for a second time, and that marriage only lasted two years—my stepdad had 5 children—we had 4 in a very crowded house. My stepdad would beat my mom, so I witnessed my mother getting beaten and my biological dad falling drunk. The person my mother married a third time was a gambler. My mom was a psychiatric nurse and practiced nursing for 20 years. 

When we lived in Montgomery County, PA, my brother went into the service, my one sister moved to New York City and my other sister, who is just 4 years older than me, was very close; she became a heroin addict. This was back in the 60s so there weren’t many addicts around back then—maybe 20 in the whole area—and I knew all 20 of them, so I watched them shoot up, and one time I was watching this guy, and he was rocking back and forth, saying, “I got to get straight.” And, I thought to myself, if he wanted to get messed up... Why does he want to get straight? Then, I realized when they were sitting in the apartment, a few people went down to Philadelphia to get the drugs, and they came back, and we would shoot up the drugs. When I saw him all disheveled and disoriented after the shot of heroin, suddenly his countenance changed, and it was fine again, and I thought to myself, “I got to get straight.” That influenced me profoundly watching the change come over him to where that evening, at 12 years old, I went directly to shooting up heroin. Before this, I was smoking marijuana. People say that heroin is better than sex—I thought it was better than life because I didn’t like my life and if it were going to end, I would be fine with that, so I went on to use heroin and various drugs—I didn’t have a lot of money, so I had to steal, and I wasn’t good at it back then, so by the time I was 18, I went to prison. I spent a little time in prison, and when I got there, I realized that there were a lot of things—a lot of different crimes—I learned and was back in 1972, so all I learned in prison was how to make friends with criminals and how to do crimes without getting caught. So after I got out, I became very sophisticated. I would go to the library and I would research different crimes I could do and look at how much time I would have to serve in prison to determine if it was worth it—I wasn’t going to do a crime unless I could make a lot of money, so I started to get involved with forgeries and prescription writing and calling in prescriptions, which made a tremendous amount of money. I don’t want to disclose that—the statute of limitations is up; I don’t want to encourage people to get involved with it. My heroin addiction got bad, and I started losing everything—the people I love were gone, I couldn’t trust anybody, and it wore on me—I got very tired of it after 10 years, so I finally quit, married a girl I met even though I wasn’t prepared at all for marriage, and she was an alcoholic and I was a drug addict. I started taking pills because they were easier to get. It was cheaper. I could get a prescription, and I could sell the pills for an extraordinary price. When I was in Philadelphia, there was a guy who was the number one drug dealer, and he was selling Codeine Syrup and Doriden—it was a sleeping pill and I told him, Why don’t we get the Codeine pills? From this, we invented the thing called Combos in Philadelphia. And that became famous among the heroin addicts. I took a different mixture—I took amphetamines and codeine. The Codeine was to kill the pain, and that made me feel like a god—or like Superman. I had more energy to do more crime, and it was just one thing after another. We would have runners to get the prescriptions I wrote, and for each $6 prescription, we would make several hundred dollars. I then started to get involved in Speed, and Philadelphia was the Speed capital of the world—all the Speed that came into the United States was hubbed in Philadelphia—on every street corner; you can get methamphetamine, and when there was a federal laboratory that was robbed, my company got the Speed—it was pure methamphetamine, and we had to cut it down several times; it was still very powerful, and a lot of it went out to California. So, I was doing various kinds of crimes, and when I got married, we did have a son, and I was proud about that and laid off shooting up for a while, but drank. From all the shooting up though, I had hepatitis A twice and hepatitis B, and actually at one time I had hepatitis A and B the same time, and what I didn’t realize was that I had hepatitis C as well in the latter years and went through the treatment at the time was Interferon. Things like this went on for about 20 years. In those years, I would be in and out of prison, and I left my wife and son because I was too out of control.

For a year, I became homeless, sold drugs while on the streets, and stayed at people’s places for shelter. The police and other people couldn’t find me. I finally got fed up with it, so I committed myself to the state hospital and told them I was going to take my life—I wasn’t going to—I just needed to get out of the whole drug scene. They put me in there, and that’s when I found out I had hepatitis A and B at the same time, so they sent me to the hospital and treated me there for a while, and then I went back to the state hospital. They told me that I couldn’t stay there because I wasn’t crazy and I had methamphetamine psychosis, so I asked them to send me to drug rehab because that’s what I truly needed, so they sent me to a place in Pottstown, PA for an 84-day treatment program. 

How did you overcome your addiction and give your life to Christ?

While there, the lady who cooked the meals was a born-again Christian. We would talk to each other because I did commit myself to Christ and believed for a while that I was saved, but then when I saw myself wired up on drugs, I realized that I wasn’t. One of my prayers whenever I thought I was going to overdose and before I passed out was, “Jesus, let me get saved before I die.” He did answer that prayer.  How did you break free from drug addiction and come to know Jesus? While I was at the treatment center in Pottstown, this lady would get all the people at the church to pray for somebody, and that February, she prayed for me. She had all the girls from the church send me cards and letters. I was very grateful for this. When I got out in March, my friend and I came across a church in Pottstown, so we went in. As I walked up to the church, I heard music playing, and when I opened the sanctuary doors, it was the first time I ever felt love. I gave my life to the Lord and began to attend this church, but I don’t know if I was saved right away because I was still possessed by demons. The way I found out was they had an inner healing ministry and they addressed the demons that were in me and I heard them speak and it was crazy. It was a horrifying experience. I remember feeling a heavy weight on top of me and I was on the floor and was laughing and doing crazy stuff, but one day, almost 2 years later—it took me 2 years to get off of the drugs—and I was sitting in a doctors office and I heard a still quiet voice in my head—it wasn’t audible, but I would run these thoughts in my head that I’m not good enough—there’s nothing good about you and putting myself down and I heard the Lord say, “You don’t need to feel this way anymore.” And then I felt the demons come off my skin—it was a very unusual feeling, and I knew they were demons leaving my body. After this moment, my mind became clear—I could think better, and it was then that I believed the Holy Spirit entered my body. The Lord cast out the demons and put the Holy Spirit in me and this is when I truly experience victory in my life. You can’t do it on your own. 

I got remarried, and in September we celebrated our 33rd anniversary—I call her my Proverbs 31 woman. I got involved with Calvary Chapel in 1991, went through a three-year ministry training course, and then became an acting associate pastor for 6 years. My wife and I had the time of our lives—we did so many ministries together. I have been so blessed—I have 3 children from my previous marriages and have 7 grandchildren; and my youngest son is getting married in October, so we’re going to have more grandchildren. I am blessed! 

Rob Weatherholtz

Director of Discipleship at Still Water's--The Potter's House Ministry

"And we know that God works all things together for the good of those who love Him, who are called according to His purpose ." (Romans 8:28 BSB) 

"The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me to lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside the still waters. He restores my soul; He leads me in the paths of righteousness For His name's sake." (Psalm 23:1-3) 

Rob shared his testimony on a VictoryEmbraced: Truth, Talk & Testimonies broadcast. 

Please consider, liking, sharing, and subscribing to the channel. Thank you!

These are the questions that I asked Rob during his interview on the VictoryEmbraced: Truth, Talk & Testimonies YouTube channel, and what he shared. 

May you share what the Lord has been doing in your life for the past 15 years? You shared with me that you saw Still Water’s Recovery Center—The Potter’s House Ministry—almost 20 years ago when you were in a prison cell. Can you share your life circumstances? Why did you need to go to prison and share the vision God showed you while you were there?

I grew up in a very dysfunctional family—my dad was a Korean War veteran. My mother was a beautician raised in a higher society atmosphere than my dad, so their relationship was like leather and lace getting together, and here I came. Still, there was a lot of dysfunction and violence in my family growing up that took root in my life negatively. When my dad left, I was young and started searching for meaning and direction in my life. Unfortunately, I began gravitating towards older guys in the community, which exposed me to drinking and alcohol at a young age. As life went on, I felt a lot of confusion about who I was, where I belonged, and why my family was not together. When I was younger, I had unresolved issues and nobody to guide me through healing, resulting in numerous bad choices that led to multiple DUIs and eventually landed me in Lancaster County Prison.

I was in Lancaster County Prison for a year, and during the ninth month, they put me on work release. Unfortunately, I was self-employed at the time as a contractor, so they wouldn’t let me go out to work unless I was working for somebody else. As a result, they kept me on the work release block for 3 months, but they didn’t allow me to go out and work. During this time, there were a lot of guys that went out to work, and the guy who was one of my cellmates came back from a job that he was working that day, and he brought back chewing tobacco, and that’s illegal in Lancaster County Prison. 

I was a model prisoner and worked in the warden’s office. When my cellmate came back from his job, I was in the office working, and the guards went through our cell and found chewing tobacco. Unfortunately, what happens in a scenario like this is that you both go into the hole—the “dungeon.” I was supposed to be down there for a month. While there, I needed to take a serious look at my life. I have been married before and had three beautiful children—Jacob, Joshua, and Jonathan—and my current amazing wife Beth and daughter Tisha. I had a good-sized construction business, and here I was going from being a member of the County Building Association to losing my family and ending up in prison, and I came to the end of myself when I was there. I got so desperate that I dropped to my knees and cried out to the Lord, “How can this possibly happen? How can I go from having a business to being prosperous, and end up losing my freedom? I’d rather die than go on like this—I have lost everything that meant anything to me! God, if you’re real, reveal yourself to me!" Suddenly, I experienced a sense of peace and witnessed an illumination in which I saw a cross. It was not a wooden cross, but rather a glowing one through which I could see upwards. When I looked up through it, I realized that I was in the Lord's presence. It was so amazing! There were murders, rapists, bank robbers—all kinds of foul stuff went on down there, and when I saw that, I started singing, and pure joy overcame me. All the demonic forces in the hole went silent, and peace came over the entire unit. It was so surreal that you could tell you were in the presence of something holy, and the Lord became very real to me at that moment. I will never forget that, and as a matter of fact, I share this experience in my book, A Raptured Heart. It was shortly after that they thought I had lost it, but I can tell you that I had my mental health restored right then and there. 

For the last month of my sentence, I went back up to the block, and while there, I was sitting reading my Bible. I read my Bible cover-to-cover twice in that year, and it became very, very real to me. I had a hunger and thirst for more of the Word of God. And all of a sudden, I had a vivid vision of a property my dad owned along the Conestoga River with buildings on it. I heard the Lord speak to my heart in a still, small voice, saying that one day, He was going to bring forth a healing center on this property. People will hear about Me from you, and they will experience a new level of freedom. They will be healed and delivered from addiction, which will then prepare them for their purpose. 

It was at this time in my life that I became born again. From then on, some amazing things started happening. A Chaplin named Bud Roda came to see me, and The Potter’s House Ministry released me. While there, I formed a friendship with Lloyd Hoover, the Executive Director and Founder of The Potter’s House. Over time, I left there for about 5 years and went to Virginia Beach for a great job to help pay the large amount of child support I needed to pay. A gentleman by the name of John Holly, who’s a retired Navy Seal, took me in, and he was a father figure to me. He helped me mature, grow up a lot, and man up to my responsibilities, and I was down there for several years. Today, John is helping those in recovery and doing outstanding work. He started a ministry called Seals In Recovery and helped me get to another level in the ability to do things, so when I went back to Pennsylvania, I started my business again and reconnected with Lloyd Hoover. At this time, I heard that small voice again, and that still small voice said, “Finish what I had started in you—finish the work that started in you.” In 2013, Lloyd invited me onto the Board of Directors of The Potter’s House Ministry. At this time, my father got ill, and I walked with him for the last three years of his life, from 2013 to 2016. In 2016, he got very sick, passed away, and left me the property that I saw in the vision. Suddenly, it was like this gigantic jigsaw puzzle in the sky coming together. I went to the Board of Directors and shared with them that I had a vision and that this place was going to be a healing center for the lost, broken, and addicted in this county, and I wanted to do what I could to see this through. I thought these guys were going to think I was crazy and laugh me out of the room, or they were going to say yes. The next thing you know is we prayed about it for 2 to 3 weeks, and one gentleman of the Board of Directors, John Wagner, his wife’s brother, is a consultant, and he came to talk to us about starting a capital campaign to raise 2 million dollars to build this facility and just a couple of years before, the Lord gave me the vision in a prison cell, and, all these pieces of this puzzle were coming together. Do you know how I know that this was God? Because it was never my plan for my life. I thought I would continue in construction until I got older and maybe move to Florida, but God had other plans for me, and He earmarked this property for this Still Waters Recovery Center. 

I partnered with The Potter’s House Ministry and the Board of Directors, and the entire community came alongside us, including the building community, suppliers, and the Amish. They all did an amazing job! Lloyd and I sat down and designed the houses, and after we designed them, we went to an architect and told him what we wanted—we had favor from God and favor from people. It amazed me because even the people on the township board supported us and embraced the idea. I was told by the surveyor that what we did it in 2 years; normally, it takes 5 to 10 years to get approved. So, we started raising funds in 2017, but by mid-2018, we had raised $850,000, obtained approval for all the permits, and initiated construction in April 2019. 

A heavy machine operator cleared fifty trees on the property to make way for the new center—it looked like a tornado came through the area. I would have never thought this beautiful facility would have come out of it in a million years. Praise the Lord! To this day, I can see God’s hand in every step—He had contractors, builders, architects, the township supervisors, and the water and sewer authority lined up. We encountered an issue with the well as it was not sufficiently deep and did not yield enough water. To address this, we hired a skilled driller who went down 500 feet and discovered an existing water source that could adequately supply more than enough water for the entire facility. It was nothing short of miraculous, and it set the stage for my life’s work as a Director of Discipleship at The Potter’s House Ministry. I’m also an associate pastor at Breakout Ministries in Leola, PA, and I have written two books. We have built a beautiful center for healing for those who are addicted. I’m also a volunteer chaplain at Lancaster County Prison to do interviews to bring people to the recovery center—the same prison that I was in—and I have recently obtained an addiction counseling degree, but mainly I’m a minister of the gospel; the one who set me free; He can set anyone free; for those the Lord has set free are free indeed.

Rob Weatherholtz is the Director of Discipleship at Still Water's--The Potter's House Ministry in Lancaster County, Pennsylvania area, and the author of two books--A Raptured Heart and The Believer's Warfare. For more information please visit their ministry site at https://thepottershouselancaster.com/

The vision that the Lord showed Rob in his prison cell was built and many lives are breaking free from addiction, being healed, and coming to Christ! (Overhead view of Still Waters Recovery Center/The Potter's House Ministry.)

 Rob’s book is available for purchase on Amazon, either as a Kindle ebook or in paperback. 

Click on the book covers to be brought to Rob's author page.  

Jesus Advantage

Pastor Rob is a Pastor of Addiction Recovery and Discipleship at Breakout Ministries. He and his wife Beth head up Jesus Advantage (JA) a Christian-based recovery meeting in Leola, PA. 

For more information, contact Pastor Rob or Beth Westherholtz @ JAbreakoutministries@gmail.com. 

Lisa Buldo

Mentoring, Coaching, Consulting, Author, and Host of The Victorious Life Broadcast

"But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ." (1 Corinthians 15:57) 

I was a very sickly child with asthma and allergies, which I developed at the age of 4. I struggled with asthma and allergies throughout my teen years as well. Then, at the age of 19, I developed acne, which I had for 15 years, and then in my early 30s, I struggled with digestive problems. The Lord burned a passion in me for nutrition, health, and wellness. Through all of this, I have learned how to get healthy and overcome my health challenges. Later on, I went on to become a Certified Health Coach. I have been working with clients and speaking all over the nation for 17 years, and I have been a researcher of health and nutrition for 23 years. 

Additionally, I went through a traumatic divorce in 1999, and it humbled me to the point of death. The reason for the divorce was due, in part, to my beginning. I grew up without a father, and I had abandonment issues along with fear, anger, and depression. It carried right into adulthood. I did not know how to have a proper relationship. I was very needy, controlling, and angry, and it ruined my marriage. After the divorce, I was so angry and depressed that I couldn’t eat, sleep, or think straight. I just existed. I sought out astrologers and psychics for help, and it made my situation worse. I had panic attacks and constant anxiety. 

One day, while I was at work, I had such a bad anxiety attack that I thought my heart would jump out of my chest. I went into the bathroom and locked the door, got on my knees, leaned over the toilet seat, and said, "God, I surrender. Please, if you help me, I’ll do anything. I don’t want to die!” A couple of minutes later, I composed myself and went back to my desk. As I wiped the tears from my eyes, a co-worker said to me, “Why don’t you just call your church and see if they can help you?” Embarrassed as I was, I did call my church to ask for help. They put me in touch with a woman who would forever change my life. Her name is Florence. I counseled with Florence once a week for 6 months, and I grew strong in the Lord. I read about 25 books during that time by Kenneth E. Hagin, and that began my “faith walk.” I’ve never looked back. I’ve been walking and growing in the Lord ever since, and I have overcome my struggle with fear, anger, and depression. I now coach clients all over the world and travel, speaking on the subject of healthy and victorious living. I specialize in healthy weight loss, type 2 diabetes, acne, and digestive issues, as well as the emotional issues of fear, anger, and depression, through the Biblical principles in God's Word. The scripture verse that helped me the most during the worst of my struggles is: “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” (Romans 8:28) I am called to spread the Good News, be a light in a dark place, and help the multitudes live in victory! 

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." (Romans 8:28) 

Lisa shared her testimony on a VictoryEmbraced: Truth, Talk & Testimonies broadcast. Please consider liking, sharing, and subscribing. Thank you! 

         Mentoring/Coaching/Consulting in Faith, Healing, and Kingdom Authority

The Victorious Life (Streaming Live Every Thursday at 8pm EST

IT CAN BE DONE! You Can Live In Victory 24/7

    Joel Jakubowski 

Men's Ministry Director at The Potter's House Addiction Recovery & Discipleship Ministry 

"The grass withers, the flower fades, But the word of our God stands forever.”  (Isaiah 40:8)

Hello, my name is Joel. I am a sinner saved by grace, God’s grace, that is. I am a man who has experienced deliverance from the grasp of darkness. And today, I walk upright in the light of Christ.

My parents divorced when I was pretty young. My sister and I continued to live with my mother. After my father’s departure, my mother succumbed to mental illness. Unfortunately, this left my sister and me to “raise ourselves.” The torment of loneliness, abandonment, and uncertainty permeated my innocent heart and soul. At the age of eight, I had become disillusioned with this life and the love it was offering. It was only a matter of time before I reached for the hand of Satan in the form of a marijuana cigarette, and this marked the beginning of my near-fatal sin-induced demise. After the succession of poor decisions, misbelief, and compromises, I became a full-time crack addict that lasted twenty-eight years. Eventually, it was painstaking to acknowledge my skeletal reflection in the mirror, a mirror that so bitterly mocked my bondage. And then, finally came God’s miraculous light. My sister had been delivered in Christ for several years, bringing the Teen Challenge program into my seemingly hopeless world of degradation. And just in time, because thoughts of suicide were now becoming the center of my attention.

On June 16, 2003, I entered the Teen Challenge induction center in the heart of Newark, New Jersey’s urban jungle. I did not come to search out Christ’s heart but only to attempt to stay clean for a year. But much to my exceeding joy, I can say now that Jesus was there waiting to search my heart. I did not know it then, but I realize now that God had given me the so precious and necessary gift of brokenness! He had prepared in me a receptive heart to receive this life’s only truth: His Son finally. Little did I know that the hole in my heart was Christ-shaped all along.

I gave my life to the Lord in a public confession only ten days after arriving at the center. I graduated from the induction center and began a more exhaustive pursuit of God’s heart. Here at that training center in Rehrersburg, Pennsylvania, I fell in love with Jesus. I then began to study the scriptures and learn of God’s promises. I found that my faith in His Word and in His love had the power to “repay me for the years the locusts have eaten.” (Joel 2:25) I found that He had a plan for my life, “to give me a hope and a future”. (Jeremiah 29:11) Praise God! He said I was a new creation in Christ! (2 Corinthians 5:17) At last, I had finally found TRUTH!

Then it began--God restored the trust I had betrayed among my loved ones. He restored my wonderful mother’s mind and our once strained relationship. He renewed my heart and transformed my entire perspective of life and my fellow man. He gave me His love, the only love that cannot disappoint or fade away. He gave me a calling and taught me the meaning of life--To love and serve God. As a result of my devotion, He has continued to bless my socks off to this very day!

Again my name is Joel, a sinner turned saint saved by loving grace. May God bless you!

Joel is a Men's Ministry Director at The Potter's House which is a safe place for men & women to recover from addiction, to experience Christ-centered discipleship, and embrace their God-given destiny for their lives. For more information please visit their ministry site at https://thepottershouselancaster.com/

Purchase Joel's book by clicking on the book cover below.

Joel's testimony from the VictoryEmbraced book was featured on CBN's The 700 Club 

Breaking Free From Addiction 

Faith Aponte

Author of Coming Out of Witchcraft

“Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.” Matthew 6:34

These are the questions that I asked Faith during her interview on VictoryEmbraced: Truth, Talk & Testimonies YouTube channel, and what she shared. Please like, share, and subscribe by clicking on the channel logo. Thank you! :) 

Did you grow up in a Christian home? 

Faith: I grew up in a Christian home. I guess with not understanding information, for me, it was like okay we just have to wake up to go to church early, sing songs, have snacks, and do crafts but I never really understood who Jesus was in my walk.

When & why did you get into practicing witchcraft? 

Faith: I got into witchcraft after my sexual assault as a way to try to control situations to protect myself from more hurt. In the spring of 2016, someone sexually assaulted me, and it left me feeling very broken and lost. I questioned God a lot then, saying to Him, Well, God, I went to church in the morning, and I did all this, and why didn’t you protect me?” I was scrolling on social media one day and saw that you can open up your “third-eye” chakra and root yourself, and they said, Did you know you’re more powerful and you just need to tap into that? It led me down a rabbit hole of new-age things like reading tarot cards and casting spells to take control of things to protect myself.

What kind of witchcraft were you involved in? What are the dangers of practicing witchcraft? 

Faith: I used to practice as an eclectic witch, which is a witch that practices a variety of different methods. Whatever caught my eye or interest in witchcraft, that’s what I did. Through a witchcraft app, I learned and practiced voodoo, ouija boards, light and dark magic, tarot cards, spirit boxes, horoscopes, and crystals. I thought I was doing the right thing, so hence, I was a “good witch,” as people would say, but witchcraft is witchcraft. Because of my Christian background, I focused more on angels and started worshiping them, and the Bible says we shouldn’t worship or serve anything but the Lord. I was heavily into Roman and Greek mythology because I believed that based on my zodiac sign, that was a god that I served, and it had me go into a whole rabbit hole of a bunch of different things. I was heavy on horoscopes too, and I would not start my day until I read my daily horoscope, and that was my Bible. For instance, if it told me not to get into an agreement or not talk to a certain friend, I would not talk to that friend or get into an agreement, and it had me in bondage and controlled my life instead of being led by the Holy Spirit and doing what the Lord wanted me to do and live. These became idols and opened demonic doors in my life. I was in bondage and walking into darkness, not knowing I was agreeing with Satan’s plan and not God’s plan and purpose for my life. Satan and demons are real, and witchcraft opens demonic doors. I put myself in danger with the spirit realm, and I didn’t put two and two together—I just thought... Oh, this is fun, and it’s very, very dangerous and nothing to play with. 

How did Jesus help you heal from the trauma you have gone through & come out of witchcraft? 

Faith: I don’t want to sugarcoat anything—I’m still healing from the sexual assault. Healing is like layers, one on top of the other. I love how Jesus helps us heal. Daily, I make the choice to give up my past, remain completely surrendered to Him, trust Him, be obedient to what He teaches, expose what happened to me, and be very transparent. I have given the book He had me write to Him. My testimony is in there, and that’s part of my healing. He heals one layer at a time as I continue to lay everything down and give it to Him.   

Things kept on getting worse and worse and I was exhausted from trying to control and protect myself from everything and I realized that I’m not powerful, only God is. I completely surrendered to Him, and that’s how I got out of witchcraft. Once I gave everything to God, He led me to a church in North Carolina, and a guy prophesied over my life and shared with me I used to live in Pottstown, PA, was sexually assaulted, involved with witchcraft, and that I was in a homosexual relationship. I got delivered, woke up the next day and everything was gone—the depression, the anxiety; everything. I repented to God that I was wrong; I completely surrendered to Him and told Him I would trust Him—I wouldn’t be here today if it weren’t for God. 

Why is it important to know your identity in Christ? 

Faith: It’s very important to come to know our identity in Christ because if you don’t know your identity in Christ, the enemy will give you a false identity. I talk about this in my book Coming Out of Witchcraft because a lot of people are claiming false identities known as zodiac signs. Nobody wants to be friends with a Gemini because they’re too-faced, but you’re coming in agreement with the spirit of confusion, Satan, and multiple personality disorders. If you don’t know your identity in Christ, the enemy is going to give you a false one, and you’re going to be walking in bondage, and you’re not going to be walking God’s truth about what He says about you in His Word.

How can you encourage others never to get involved with anything related to witchcraft?

Faith: I always start with my testimony because I’ve noticed that, especially when God puts somebody in my path, I always tell them my testimony—the testimony that God has given me to share. Sometimes, the only Bible that people are going to read is you, so your testimony is so important, and if somebody doesn’t know, I’m like, Hey, do you know the history of the evil eye? or Hey, do you know what’s wrong with using crystals? I will ask them questions. And they say, Well, it will protect me, and I can share that God can protect you. It opens up the door for prayer and sharing about Jesus, but led by the Holy Spirit because not everyone will receive you—we are hard-headed—and sometimes God will allow us to walk in our consequences for us to learn so we can then help other people. 

Purchase Faith's Book on Amazon or Barnes & Noble

In the book, Faith shares her struggles of going through sexual assault, homosexuality, prostitution, mental health issues, and more. The book also shares how she got involved in new age and occult practices and how Jesus saved her. Coming Out of Witchcraft exposes Satan's kingdom and it includes prayer points, biblical scripture, and steps to take to break free from the kingdom of darkness.

Faith, may you share a little bit about your book? When we talked on the phone, you shared something that I related to because I struggled the same way in school. 

Faith: Yes. I am not an author—I'm just a person who is on fire for Jesus. In first grade, I had a speech impediment and IEP and got held back a year. Writing was not my first strong suit, nor is math really, so I would mess up words—I guess you can say like dyslexia—but I felt God showed me that this is what I was to do, and I was very discouraged at first when writing the book and showing it to people because they would say, “Oh, you got mistakes in there,” and I thought I should pull it back and fix it, but God said no—I chose you and had me read about Moses because he stuttered. God will use you where you don’t think you can be used, and that’s the thing that keeps me humble. I can tell you that Coming Out of Witchcraft is Holy Spirit-led. The Lord would wake me up to write between 5 a.m. and 6 a.m., and I'm not a morning person. I did my best to walk in obedience, and you know, obedience is way better than sacrifice, because that was the thing that I had to lay down. In essence, I needed to lay down my past so I could go into my future. All glory be to God!

Faith shared her testimony on VictoryEmbraced: Truth, Talk & Testimonies YouTube Channel.

Click on the Photo Below for the Broadcast Interview

Please consider sharing, liking, and subscribing. Thank you! :)

Bible scriptures and teaching resources that were used during the broadcast.

“Beloved, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits, whether they are of God;” (1 John 4:1  NKJV)

“...Satan himself masquerades as an angel of light.”  (2 Corinthians 11:14 BSB)

“For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness…”  (Ephesians 6:12 NKJV)

“You must not turn to mediums or spiritists; do not seek them out, or you will be defiled by them. I am the LORD your God.”  (Leviticus 19:31 NASB)

“But the cowardly, the unbelieving, the vile, the murderers, the sexually immoral, those who practice magic arts, the idolaters and all liars—they will be consigned to the fiery lake of burning sulfur. This is the second death.” (Revelation 21:8 NIV)

The importance of knowing scripture: In Acts 17:11 it teaches us to be a good Berean & to examine the scriptures every day to see if what is said is true.

Teaching Resources from Bible Questions Answered/Got Questions Ministries:  

What Does the Bible Say about Witchcraft? https://www.gotquestions.org/Bible-witchcraft.html

***At the root of witchcraft is the desire to control events that are not ours to control–only God’s. The desire has roots in satan’s first temptation to Eve–“You can be like God” in Genesis 3:5*** 

Put on the whole armor–dress for battle–Ephesians 6:10-17  https://www.gotquestions.org/full-armor-of-God.html

Brittany Gilchrist

And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast.  

1 Peter 5:10

My name is Brittany, and I’m married to my high school sweetheart! We have two daughters, two dogs, three chickens, and a horse, and our lives are complete! Our journey has been one of ups and downs, but drastically changed twelve years ago, on June 22, 2011. Before that, we were finally settled into the life that we had worked so hard for and planned. My husband had a great job that was leading to bigger opportunities; he began working on his novel; we had just purchased our first home; and our second daughter had just been born. Our life was sweet and planned. We were settling into a routine as a little family of four, and we had a pretty good idea of what our life was going to look like.

The 22nd of June started like any other day with a newborn and a toddler—busy and hot! My oldest had been at a summer program at our local church, so the little one and I picked her up and left the church parking lot, and that’s my last memory of that day. Once we pulled onto Highway 41, we traveled a mile or two, and our Nissan Sentra collided head-on with a lifted F250 Super Duty truck that blew a tire and caused the driver to lose control. The truck went across the double yellow lines without being able to steer or brake, into oncoming traffic, and directly into us. The remainder of what was left of our car caught fire, and smoke filled the entire car.

We were trapped. I was unresponsive. My babies were alone, scared, and injured. Throughout this journey, not being able to remember has been excruciating. It’s bittersweet and absolutely surreal. I wish I could have been there to comfort them. I wanted to tell them that everything would be fine, but I couldn’t. Timing is everything. We weren’t alone for very long. With a busy highway and an accident as severe as ours, traffic began to back up as far as the eye could see. Traveling directly behind us were our angels in disguise. These men wasted no time and surrounded our car, deciding how they were going to rescue us. With nothing else to use, they broke our car windows with rocks and their own fists. They freed my babies, at the risk of being overtaken by the hot and pungent smoke. The damage to our car was so severe that it had shifted me from being a driver to nearly a passenger, with my lower half being barely visible. I couldn’t move to be freed. But they didn’t leave me. They didn’t run away or throw up their hands. They stayed, and they tried again—on three they pulled, all grasping a different part of me, and as I was freed, our entire car then went up in flames.

Those angels, our heroes, were all acknowledged, and the one who went over and beyond was awarded the American Red Cross Hero award for his actions, heroism, bravery, and love. There are a few things that I don’t remember from this day, such as my Life Flight helicopter ride, the two times that it was necessary to resuscitate me to save my life, and the next three days, which were a blur.

The few things I do remember when I awoke were that I knew my life would never be the same; when I was told that they rated our accident unsurvivable; and the many times I needed to be reminded that my babies had survived—we were all miracles.

It’s been a very long twelve years, filled with pain, surgeries, and too many appointments to count. In the midst of everything, there are also many amazing stories, situations, people, miracles, and acts of grace. We will never forget what we have been through—our journey hasn’t been easy, and there were times when it seemed overwhelming and too hard to bear.

My girls were both taken by ambulance to the closest children’s hospital, where my oldest spent over a month in recovery. My injuries were extensive. I fractured both femurs, a compound fracture of my right tibia and fibula, the left clavicle, the sternum, and the ribs, just to name a few. I needed to learn how to walk again, but I was very thankful for my legs—I created these attitudes and differing emotions and perspectives that I had to battle and navigate constantly. The reality and pain of what had happened were compared to the thankfulness and gratitude for life and miracles. That was our reality—it’s still our reality.

Today, we are changed. We see life from different perspectives; we see through different lenses. Not only has our perspective changed, but who we are as people has changed. We are definitely products of the things we experience, but we have a choice in how we respond to and react to those experiences. Bad things happen, unfortunately. It’s the sinful and fallen world we live in, but we can rise from the trauma and let it shape us into people of grace who exhibit empathy, love, joy, and hope. Life is short. Time is precious, as are the friends and family who surround you. God has a plan and purpose for each of us. He can make beauty out of ashes, and if we let Him, He will use everything we are and everything we encounter, both painful and joyful, for our good and His glory! We’ve experienced miracle after miracle. Not only were we spared from an unsurvivable car accident, but we were mostly unscathed from a second car accident in 2018. We have been healed miraculously time and time again. We have been provided for physically, spiritually, emotionally, and financially. Our every need has been met. Once again, the road hasn’t been easy, to say the least. It’s been full of pain and sadness. It’s been a fight. But we’ve not had to fight alone. We have never been alone. At times, we’ve had to trudge through mud to keep going, while other times we’ve floated on our backs down a clear stream. Either way, God has been our constant and our anchor. We strive each day to trust Him fully and step out, one foot in front of the other. He is in full control. We have been called to tell our story—to tell of the amazing and miracle-performing God whom we serve. He is alive today, friends. He is moving and working on our behalf, for our good and His glory. He is an awesome God, and nothing is impossible with Him. Today, what remains is the hope of eternity. What remains is the excitement of a life led by the Holy Spirit. What remains is the promise that our good Father will never leave us or forsake us. We take one day at a time around our home, thankful for the life that’s been given to us. Our days may be messy at times, and life is raw and real, but our time and our actions are intentional as we walk hand in hand with our Savior. My prayer for each of you would be that you would know your infinite worth and how much you are loved by your Creator. That you would crave more of what God has for you and know that He has a plan and purpose for your life, as you’ve been uniquely created! Finally, my prayer is that you walk this life in fullness and VICTORY! He is with you and for you.

Nissan Sentra June 22, 2011

Brittany's Family

Brittany's testimony,  shared with VictoryEmbraced, was featured on CBN's 700 Club. Enjoy and please share this amazing testimony.  

Mom Rescued Seconds Before Car Explodes

Patrick Fitzpatrick

Plumstead Christian School Head of School in Buck's County, PA

Children's Book Author

For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Walk as children of light. (Ephesians 5:8)

Those who come to our door tonight will find an extra treat nestled in among the candies of each bag of treats—a Happy Halloween tract. Sure, most of these tracts will be tossed into the trash, but maybe when you discover what happened to me forty-nine years ago on this night you will understand why my family tries to shine brightly on one of the darkest nights of the year. On Halloween night, 1974, I donned a homemade costume (I think I was a clown) and canvassed my neighborhood in Escondido, CA, in search of candy. I was ten and in fourth grade. I filled my pillowcase to overflowing with lots of treats, and I remember one elderly lady throwing a little booklet into my bag in addition to the candy she gave me. I really didn’t think more about the booklet, but when my mother went through my candy to make sure it was all safe, she discovered the booklet. It was a religious booklet, and she took the time to read it that evening. It piqued her curiosity about God and inspired her to join a Bible study, and my mother discovered through this Bible study that God loved her despite her sin and that He made a way for her to be reconciled to Him through the sacrificial death of His Son, Jesus. She gave her heart and life to God that day, and my father, my siblings, and I noticed immediately my mom’s transformation. One day, soon after her conversion, she sat down with me and explained not only her journey but also how I too could be saved. I wanted this. I believed. My journey of faith has now spanned forty-nine years, and my relationship with God is stronger and more alive today. I now draw my nourishment from the living water, and I am blessed to be called God’s adopted son. God used this one woman’s simple act of obedience to transform four generations of Fitzpatricks! Praise God. So, yes, when the neighborhood children are out collecting their treats, we are committed to presenting them with the best treat of all – the good news of Jesus Christ. Please join in praying for those who are being presented with the gospel on Halloween night.

A Resource to Purchase to Share the Love of Christ on Halloween 

Patrick is the author of two children's books. Please click on the book photos to be directed to where you can purchase them.

Melissa Ohden

Founder & Director of The Abortion Survivors Network, Author & Speaker

"But none of these things move me; nor do I count my life dear to myself, so that I may finish my race with joy, and the ministry which I received from the Lord Jesus, to testify to the gospel of the grace of God." (Acts 20:24)

Abortion is a decision that has a detrimental effect on many across generations. In August of 1977, my biological mother entered St. Luke’s Hospital in Sioux City, Iowa, to undergo a saline infusion abortion. Little did she know that this one decision, and this one moment in time—would have a far-reaching effect on so many peoples’ lives.

A saline infusion abortion involves the injection of a toxic salt solution into the amniotic fluid surrounding the pre-born child in the womb. The salt solution intends to scald the child to die from the outside in. Suppose you ever look up ‘saline infusion for abortion’ or read about children like me who are aborted by saline infusion. In that case, you will find that we are called the “red-skinned” or “candy-apple” babies because it turns the child’s skin red as it burns it, peels it, and moves internally into the body to burn up the organs.

After the toxic salt solution was delivered into the amniotic fluid that surrounded me, I was bathed in the poisonous salt solution for approximately five days. Truly, this solution should have burned me to death while I was in my biological mother’s womb, and she should have given birth to a dead child. Instead, on the fifth day of the abortion procedure, labor was successfully induced, and she gave birth to a live child—me! 

Over the years, I have been told that it was initially known that I had been unsuccessfully aborted. It has been said that after I was delivered spontaneously at the hospital, I was believed to be dead. I was even left for dead and placed along the bedside table. Nevertheless, by the grace of God, a nurse was tending to my mother, noticed that I was making grunting noises and small movements. The doctors and nurses then started to provide the medical care I needed to sustain my fragile life.

Medical documents indicate that my mother thought that she was approximately 18 to 22 weeks pregnant with me when she attempted to abort me. The fact that I survived and that I weighed 2 pounds, 14 ounces, indicates that she was at least six to seven months pregnant. One of the first documentations in my medical records states that I looked like I was “approximately 31 weeks gestation.”  

Despite my miraculous survival, the doctors did not believe that I would live very long, and if I did live—I probably would be disabled. After I survived the failed abortion attempt, I suffered from numerous medical problems, including jaundice, severe respiratory problems, and seizures. I had to undergo multiple blood transfusions. I was too weak to suck from a bottle, so I was fed intravenously through my head for an extended period of time. My future was bleak, but I was alive! Most people would never guess by looking at me today that I suffered what I did as an infant. Today, I am the picture of health. Miraculously, I am healthier than most. I have no long-term physical consequences because of the abortion procedure and my premature birth; I am one of the blessed ones.

After I survived the failed abortion attempt, my biological parents made a courageous and loving decision. I am forever grateful to them for ultimately giving me life despite the initial attempt to end my life. I am even more thankful that they made an adoption plan after I survived. I often hear people say that it is wrong to ask a woman to carry a child to term and make an adoption plan if they feel like they don’t want to or can’t parent them. I understand the well-intentioned place in people’s hearts this comes from. However, I am a living testament to the selfless beauty and love of an adoption plan, and I have seen firsthand how adoption is a choice that EVERYONE can live with. To some—abortion appears to be a solution to the problem. Still, I have seen throughout my life that abortion is not the solution, and it is not a choice that women can live with the rest of their lives without physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual consequences. As hard as it must be to make an adoption plan for a child, it is ultimately a beautiful gift for many—the child, the biological parents, and the adoptive family.

My adoptive parents first met me when I was still in the Neo-Natal Intensive Care Unit in Iowa City, Iowa, not long after I was born. Despite the poor prognosis that the doctors had for my life, my adoptive parents did not hesitate for a second to come to visit me. My adoptive parents share that the first time they laid eyes on me, lying there in the incubator, they thought I was the most beautiful baby they had ever seen and fell in love with me. That always makes me smile because looking at baby pictures of myself, I know that I wasn’t what most people think is a beautiful baby. I was tiny, my head was shaved, I had IV ports in my head, I was in an incubator most of the time, but my adoptive parents were able to look through all of that and see the inherent beauty of God in me. 

I was blessed to go home to my adoptive family within two short months of surviving the failed abortion attempt. I went home to them before I was probably even supposed to be born! I know that the love of my adoptive parents and the nurses and doctors who cared for me helped me not only survive but also thrive. Over the years, I have remained in contact with one particular nurse who cared for me in Iowa City. Mary shared how she helped name me when I didn’t yet have a name, how she and others knitted me clothing, and how they nurtured me and believed in me during those months that I was in their care.  Growing up, I always seemingly knew that I was adopted. I grew up in a home where adoption was just a normal part of our lives. My older sister is also adopted (from another family), and our parents had always let us know how special and loved we are. After almost fifteen years of trying, our adoptive parents finally had a biological child of their own. Just as I’ve been told that there is no medical reason I have survived the failed saline infusion abortion, our parents had been told throughout those fifteen years that there was no medical reason to be found for why they couldn’t conceive. We know that it was simply God’s plan for them to be available to be our parents.  

Just as I had always known that I was adopted, I also knew I was born prematurely. It never was an issue of concern to me, as I knew many other people who were born prematurely. However, it wasn’t until I was 14 years old that I found out the truth about my life. I wasn’t just born prematurely and adopted, but I had survived a failed abortion attempt that was meant to end my life.

Just as God had His hand on my life while I was in my biological mother’s womb, I believe He planned for me to find out the truth about my survival in the manner in which I did. The Lord may not have intended for my older sister to become pregnant while she was still in high school. Still, He indeed used that experience to help all of us in our family truly understand the preciousness of every human life. My sister’s pregnancy enabled the truth to come out, as our parents felt driven to share with her the story of my survival so that she could fully understand God’s plan for every life, and recognize the beautiful importance of her giving life to her child. I can’t imagine what it was like for her to find out the truth about my life before I did. Still, I am forever grateful that she encouraged me to ask our parents for the truth about it. She is even more thankful that she fully embraced motherhood and is the mother of four amazing children today.  

Sometimes, people ask me if I’m somehow angry with my adoptive parents because they didn’t share the truth about my life sooner or without my sister’s intervention. To answer it honestly, no, I am not angry with them. I can’t imagine what it was like for them all of those years to know the truth and how much it would hurt me if I found out. As a parent, I can understand how they felt the need to protect me. Honestly, there was probably no other way that my adoptive parents would have told me the truth, knowing how much it could devastate me, except through the working hand of God in our lives.

It devastated me the night that my sister encouraged me to seek answers from our parents. I will never forget the look on my mother’s face when I shared the discussion that my sister and I had. It was a look of such anguish. I will also never forget the words that she spoke that changed our lives forever: “We just always thought you knew—There is no easy way to tell you this—we never meant to keep it from you—we love you, and we’ll always love you, Missy.” (That is what my family and close friends call me.) “Your biological mother had an abortion during her fifth month of pregnancy, and you survived it.” 

Looking back on that night, I can’t even put into words how hurt I was. For years, I had felt so special and loved. My biological parents had given me life and made an adoption plan for me; then, suddenly, I found out I had survived a lethal attempt on my life. I was devastated! I had never before even fathomed that my biological parents would have considered aborting me. For the first time in my life, I was angry with them. At 14, I couldn’t comprehend how they could have done that to me, their child. However, as mad as I was that night, my anger quickly washed away into great sadness for them because they somehow felt or were put into the position that abortion was the only option for them. Despite their decision to end my life, I love my biological parents and their families unconditionally. Jesus Christ died for them just as He died for me, and we are all sinners. I am no better or worse than they are in the Lord’s eyes, and it is not my role to judge or condemn them.

People often ask how I felt when I found out that I am an abortion survivor. Truly, I felt every feeling that’s possible to feel. I was angry. I was sad. I was scared of who I was and what this meant for my life. I felt so different and alone. I felt embarrassed and ashamed to be an aborted child. Yet, at the same time, I felt the intense love of God, the understanding that He saved me from certain death and had a plan for my life, and that I was special and wanted by Him and my adoptive family.  

Although, I was blessed with the love and support of God, my adoptive family, my  friends, my church, and school, I struggled on the inside with tumultuous feelings  about who I was and what the world said about children like me. I only had to turn on the TV or radio and open the newspaper (this was before the Internet came along) to see what the predominant culture says about abortion. The prevailing culture says, “It’s just a clump of tissue—it’s just a blob of cells—it’s not a child—it’s a choice—children who are aborted would otherwise be a drain on society—you can get rid of that one; another one will come along again when you’re ready to be a parent.” These statements weighed heavily upon my heart and by the time I went away to college, I had learned through experience to stop talking publicly about being an abortion survivor. The hurt and ridicule were just too much for me to bear at the time.

For many years, I was silenced by shame and guilt. I felt guilty for a long time that I survived when so many have not. Over 53 million children have lost their lives to abortion, and I am one of just a handful of survivors around the world and in the U.S. alone in the past 48 years. However, I knew that God intended for me to learn through my time of silent suffering and teach me how everyone is affected by abortion. Abortion silences many in our world particularly women who have had abortions and men who have played a role in the decision. I know God intended for others to learn by my experience(s) and that we must not be silenced by speaking up and speaking out for those who are rendered voiceless by abortion.

During the first couple of years of silence, I started a journey of faith that has truly transformed me. This journey has enabled me to become the person that the Lord created. I am a woman who God saved to share the gospel of life with the world and shine a light into the darkness of the pain and death caused by abortion. From the moment I learned the truth about my life as a survivor, I knew that the Lord had saved my life to testify to the truth about abortion and His redeeming grace. However, I spent many years living in fear of what He was asking me to do. I could hear Him saying, “Melissa, it’s time. It’s time to come forward and share your story with the world”. Although I knew that I needed to do it and someday would, I spent many years questioning God on how I would be able to fulfill His purpose.   

Through His grace I was able to grow in my understanding of Him and heal from the pain that I suffered emotionally and spiritually. By His grace, He has blessed me with the ability to understand others’ pain and help them find healing. After ten years of trying to find my biological parents and obtain my medical records (the two things I knew I needed to do before coming forward with my testimony), I finally succeeded. I have become stronger and bolder than ever, and I was able to find my voice after so many years of silence. 

It was certainly bittersweet to obtain my medical records. Although it was affirming to see it written in my records that a “saline infusion for an abortion was done but was unsuccessful,” it was very difficult to read about how my life was supposed to end and how I had to fight to live. Through my birth records, I quickly learned who my biological parents were. Within minutes, I discovered that not only was my biological father alive and well, but we were living in the same city as one another! How great is our God! Even though I knew that Sioux City, Iowa, is where the abortion took place, I could never have fathomed that my biological father would be living there decades later. I had not grown up in Sioux City; I had moved there during my search process to finish my Master’s degree.  

After months of praying, I decided to reach out to my biological father. Secretly in my heart, I always hoped that he didn’t play a role in the decision to end my life. In 2007, I sent him a letter to his workplace. In the letter, I told him that I knew the truth about the abortion, I had forgiven him a long time ago, I had led a beautifully blessed life, and we were living in the same city as one another. I also shared with him that if he ever wanted to communicate with me or have a relationship, I would be waiting to hear from him. And wait, I did!

Once again, in my life, I struggled with the pain of feeling rejected and alone when I didn’t hear back from him. God’s grace truly is enough, and His love runs more profound and broader than we could ever imagine, but sometimes things happen in this world that eats away at our self-esteem and self-worth. I am a living testament that nothing but the Lord can overcome that pain and transform it into something beautiful. I quickly turned over my hurt and pain to God, and about a month after I reached out to my biological father, I contacted my biological mother’s parents. Even though I knew who my birth mother was, I could not determine her maiden name or where she lived. However, I was desperate to reach out to her, so I contacted her parents in the hopes that they would share my message of forgiveness with her. Since I had never heard back from my birth father and had met my share of rejection in the world, I never expected to get a response from the letter that I sent to my maternal grandparents. But within just a few short days, I received a letter from my maternal grandfather! 

It was a great blessing to receive this letter. I am still thankful that my grandfather was kind enough to respond to it and that he was willing to share so much with me in it. Through the letter, I learned many things about my biological mother’s side of the family and the circumstances leading to my mother’s pregnancy with me. I learned that my mother dated my father throughout her teen years and that they were together for four years before becoming pregnant with me. After the abortion took place, my birth mother went on to marry someone else and had other children. Sadly, I learned that she never told anyone about me, or probably about the abortion. I certainly understand why she kept this a secret. By and large, we live in a society that doesn’t want to talk about abortion. I meet women and men every day who carry the secret of abortion and the pain, shame, and regret of it throughout their lives. It breaks my heart that my biological parents and so many like them suffer the silent pain of abortion for a lifetime and never find healing or forgiveness.

During that same period of time that I was reaching out to my birth family, I finally came forward publicly with my testimony as a survivor. The first time that I spoke was on Capitol Hill in Washington, D.C., with ‘Feminists for Life of America’. It was an empowering experience for me. All of those years that I had suffered silently, felt ashamed, embarrassed, and guilty were redeemed. I know that I have nothing to be ashamed of or feel guilty about. I am proud to be a survivor and chosen by God to do His work on this earth. Although that first speaking experience was exhilarating, it was also nerve-wracking for me. For some reason, I didn’t feel like myself and chalked it up to bad nerves. HOWEVER, what I was experiencing was a bad case of morning sickness! I was just a few days pregnant with our daughter, Olivia, the very first time that I spoke out about my survival and spoke out against abortion. 

It makes me smile every time I reflect on my first time speaking because I know that it was another excellent example of the Lord moving in our lives. For years, I desperately wanted to be a mother. The Lord blessed my husband and me with a child when I became fully obedient to Him in answering His call for my life—it was at this time that it became so clear that I was doing exactly what He intended for me to do. The Lord continues to bless Ryan and me abundantly in our lives, and I genuinely believe that our faith and obedience to the Lord continues to bring us favor.  

I delved into pro-life advocacy and speaking during my pregnancy with Olivia. I started to speak mainly on college campuses across the U.S. and Canada, sharing my testimony and encouraging campuses to take a closer look at their environment to see if they were friendly to men and women who are pregnant or parenting. And although my pregnancy with Olivia filled me with the greatest joy imaginable, some days were difficult for me because I was made infinitely aware that my own biological mother had experienced those same changes in her body during her pregnancy with me. She still made the decision to abort me.  

Throughout the past couple of years, I had learned that my birth mother really didn’t have a choice when it came to the decision to abort me. Research indicates that over 60% of women report being coerced into having an abortion. My biological mother fits these statistics. From what I’ve learned in recent years, it was likely one of her parents—my own grandparents who decided for her. It deeply saddens me that we live in a world where abortion is seen as the solution to the problems women face and that so many people call abortion a “choice,” even when both the statistics and experiences of many women reflect that most of them don’t have a choice when it comes to abortion.  

Unbeknownst to me, my biological father passed away suddenly early in 2008. I wasn’t even aware of his passing for a couple of months. I just happened to come across my father’s obituary online one night when I “Googled” his name on the Internet. I was devastated to discover that he had passed away. Despite my deep faith in the Lord, I questioned Him a lot that night. How could He let this happen? I had been looking for him all of those years, and then after I found him, he was quickly taken from me. I couldn’t understand, but I promptly was given peace about it as I heard the Lord reminding me that He is the creator of all things, and He had a plan—a plan greater than I ever could imagine.  

In the culmination of these events, I gave birth to Olivia. On April 26, 2008, she was born at St. Luke’s Hospital in Sioux City, Iowa—the very same hospital where my life was supposed to end 41 years ago. God is so good! Through His grace, the hospital that held such terrible memories for me now holds the most beautiful memories of our lives.  

A couple of weeks after Olivia was born, I first heard from my biological father’s family. Little did I know that when they cleaned out his office after he passed away, they found the letter that I had sent him tucked away in his top desk drawer. I had not heard from him all of those months; I wondered if he received the letter and if he did if he believed that I was his daughter. His family believes that because he had read and kept the letter, he knew he was my father and that someday he would do something about it.  

As devastating as it was to lose my father so suddenly and then to find out the secret he had kept all of those years, his family ultimately reached out to me around the time Olivia was born. I was blessed to meet my great aunt, grandfather, and cousin. I even had the opportunity to speak to my grandmother on the phone and to my father’s wife through email. Since then, I have continued building a solid relationship with my great aunt and grandfather. Both have met my adoptive family, and we get together as often as our schedules allow.

Sadly, these are the only two solid relationships that I have with my biological father’s family despite living in the same community as a number of them. I understand the depth of the other family members’ grief, the complexity of our lives considering the circumstances, and the shame and pain that the abortion should have ended my life caused them. It saddens me that so many families, like mine, are forever changed by abortion. Relationships become strained, secrets are hidden, and the pain and shame last for decades. I see these circumstances in families around the world through my work. I understand how our culture of death silences people who are hurting from abortion, but it’s time we break the silence and heal. I refuse to be silenced by abortion anymore, and I encourage others to step forward and break free from the chains that bind them.

I am often asked if I wish the circumstances of my life were different. Of course, I wish that my life and well-being wouldn’t have been threatened by abortion; however, I’m deeply grateful for the journey I have walked through. I am a survivor! I have experienced more than my fair share of pain and struggles, but I have become a wiser, more compassionate, and more obedient woman. I was fearful of what would happen if I stepped out of the shadows to be a light in this world for years. I desire to reveal the truth of the Lord, and the devastation of abortion can no longer silence me. I know that I don’t need to be ashamed of who I am. I am not a burden—I am a blessing. I am not simply a child who was aborted, but a woman who was fearfully and wonderfully made. 

No matter who my birth family is and how they may have felt about me early on in my life, I will always know who my Heavenly Father is and that He has great plans for me. 

“For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord…” (Jeremiah 29:11)

Melissa is the Founder & Director of The Abortion Survivors Network

To purchase Melissa's book please click on photo below

More About Melissa

Melissa is a frequent contributor to pro-life and conservative news outlets and a regular guest on radio and television programs around the world including Fox News, Focus on the Family, Hannity, The Eric Metaxas Show, Huckabee, and more. Although Melissa’s heart is for providing help and hope to all affected by abortion, she also strives to humanize the unborn through activism. She has testified before Congressional committees numerous times, as well as lobbied, and even met President Trump in the Oval Office in 2019. Fulfilling the purpose that she believes God set out for her when He saved her from the certain death of the abortion attempt, Melissa is truly a voice for the voiceless.

David Heavener  

of David Heavener TV Ministries

“Nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom. There will be famines and earthquakes in various places. ”  (Matthew 24:7)

David Heavener was born in Louisville, Kentucky, and raised in a Bible-Belt Baptist church. When he was seventeen, he packed up and headed for Nashville, Tennessee, to pursue songwriting. He soon wrote two top-ten hits, “You Say You’re a Real Cowboy” and “Love to Love You,” as well as writing music for Hee Haw and The Tonight Show. David had written, directed, and produced several films and starred in all of them within five years, despite having no film production experience and barely a dime to his name. David has produced over forty films and has released hundreds worldwide on HBO, Showtime, USA Network, etc. During the 1980s and 1990s, David Heavener became a Hollywood legend, well-known for his action films. He starred alongside legendary actors and directed the inimitable Martin Landau, Tony Curtis, Sally Kirkland, and Karen Black. David also worked with Erik Estrada, Joe Estevez, Robert Reed, Marc Singer, Margot Kidder, Oliver Reed, “Rowdy” Roddy Piper, and Ernest Borgnine. He guest-starred on Hunter and Days of our Lives and was featured on Entertainment Tonight and Backstage West. Though David was raised by churchgoers, one might assume that with this success, he bought into the Hollywood lifestyle and mindset. As he grew older, however—he spent time in God’s Word and experienced a spiritual awakening that continues to spur him on to this day. He became a lay minister in 2011 at the Methodist church in Tehachapi, California. In 2016, he called on a friend, Martin Landau. David fondly remembers that breakfast at Cantors. It was just a few months before Martin left this earthy existence. They spoke about God and faith. Martin said something that blesses David to this very day; he said, “Faith is what it’s all about, isn’t it?” David published part of that meeting and began publishing interviews on how faith and current events intersect with the supernatural. One such interview was on the oily Bible in Dalton, Georgia. David also started interviewing celebrities about their opinions on Hollywood and God. One of these interviewees was the legendary Paul Petersen. Paul shares his experience as a child star on the Donna Reed Show and how he was lucky enough to work on a TV series promoting family morals and values. Paul explains the decline that started in the sixties and his views on the terrible misuse, abuse, and exploitation of children in today’s media. It seems that television executives have forgotten about the nuclear family. In January 2017, David fell asleep in the attic of an old house in Atlanta, Georgia, and when he woke up, he had a burning desire to write. In just three and a half hours, he wrote the first six episodes of Last Evangelist, an end-time TV series revealing Revelation prophecies. He would later realize that his burning desire was from God. The Last Evangelist is a Biblically-based series about a detective who starts out working for the government, arresting those who won’t have “the chip” embedded in their bodies. (The chip represents the mark of the beast, and without it, you cannot purchase food, pay rent, etc.) One day, this detective has an experience I call a “come to Jesus meeting” and realizes he has been working for the wrong god. He totally changes, and the hunter becomes the hunted. Because of censorship on YouTube and Facebook, David has created a platform where viewers can find uncensored moral programming, revealing issues the church is afraid to discuss. Watch all seven channels of this network on David Heavener TV or Roku, Apple, Amazon Fire Stick, or Android TV. The series is ready for pre-production, but there are challenges. Since David truly believes that God wants him to release this truth in full, not in part, to maintain total creative control, he cannot distribute it through significant networks. Once you sign a deal with the studios, you give up creative control and can no longer decide what you want in the script. Hence, when you’re independent of the major studios, funding becomes a challenge. But, as the Bible says in Matthew 19:26, “with men this is impossible; but with God, all things are possible.” Please find the fundraiser by texting CHOSEN to 91999, or by visiting The Last Evangelist fundraising link. David invites us to join him in his faith, believing that God will bless. Remember the movie Field of Dreams? “If you build it, they will come.”

*Matthew 24:7 BSB